My first reading is today.

Today is a big day for me. It will be my very first “author event,” a reading and discussion of e-books at the Watertown Library. 

I posted once that I get stage fright before every class I teach. Well, I’ve got stage fright now.

Part of my brain is babbling incoherently about having to stand up in front of a bunch of people who probably knew me as a child, and ohmygod, what if the nun who taught me in the fifth grade is there and I forget to bleep myself out while I’m reading? What if my shipment of books doesn’t come in this morning and I have to go to a signing without them and what if my car breaks down or I have an allergic reaction to my lunch or my one print copy of Beware the Hawk spontaneously combusts and I lose my voice and pass out?

Another part of me knows that’s just stage fright. I hear that kind of nonsense from my brain at least three times every week.

A third part of me – the part I’m paying attention to – is so very excited to be going back to my hometown to read from a book that I wrote and that a company published. I can’t wait to get up to that podium and talk about e-books. I can’t wait to see Watertonians that I haven’t seen in ages. I can’t wait to sit down and sign some books.

And if the books don’t come in? I’ll sign Post-Its instead.

And if I lose my voice? I will use large poster boards to deliver the talk silent-film style.

And if I forget to bleep myself out and my fifth grade teacher is really in the audience? She’s heard those words before. Probably from kids who were published for saying them. I’ll just have to resign myself to having my mouth washed out with soap.

The reading/talk will take place at 7 p.m. today at the Watertown Library in Watertown, Connecticut. If you are free, come by. Maybe you’ll get to see me get my mouth washed out with soap. Maybe not. Either way, it should be a blast.

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Scavenger Hunt winners: The battle for supremacy.

Remember yesterday, when I posted the scavenger hunt winners? I posted a list of all the people who participated, and the number of missions in which they participated. This list  (which shall from this point on be referred to “The Leaderboard,” to make it seem cooler than it really is) looked like this at 11:30 yesterday:

Ally :4

Mary-Jo :4

Alena :4

E.S. : 3

Heidi: 1

Tamela : 1

Linsey : 1

As you can see, there was a three-way tie between Ally, Mary-Jo and Alena. I issued this challenge to the three front-runners: If one of you pulls ahead of the pack in the next 24 hours by submitting just one more entry, you may have the tee shirt of your choice from my store.

Then some of the participants read the post and things got real.

Except that I didn’t know how real things had gotten because this morning, my iPhone decided that I didn’t need to be notified when something was tweeted to me. I came home from work to find that three participants had attempted to submit/submitted new material and that two of the three had declared themselves “in it to win it.” One of the three was talking smack like a wrestler standing in front of WWE ringside camera.

It was awesome. And I missed most of  it. So now, I would like to post a summary of the Scavenger Hunt Battle for Supremacy. Cue the American Gladiator theme music.

Last night  – I posted the winners.

Last night – Mary-Jo has trouble uploading a tattoo photo but leaves this intriguing comment on my Facebook page:

“Mary-Jo Bates I’m having issues uploading the tatt pic, but I was impressed by Danno’s translation of my mental image into my cross tatt. Woohoo! I cannot wait to put that on my precious books’ shelf :)”

If you ever get that photo uploaded, Moj, I want to see it.

Last night –  E.S. Cameron submits a pink hair photo. I update the blog and go to sleep.

Then I wake up and this happens:

8:10 a.m  – Ally posts a photo of her tattoo. 8:44 a.m. – Ally posts a Craigslist ad, which is safe for work.

8:45 a.m. – Ally ups the ante, posting another Craigslist ad, which is probably not safe for work.

9:10 a.m.  – Alena strikes back with a twofor. Declares self “in it to win it.”

10:57 a.m. – You should not say such things to Ally, who has somehow found an actual purple shamrock and who is backing that up with a purple drawing of a shamrock, just in case I didn’t think the shamrock was purple enough. Her tweet contains the word “dammit.”

10:57 a.m.  -Ally takes some time out to taunt Tamela for making excuses.

https://twitter.com/#!/wordvagabond/status/182118760080097282

11:00 a.m.  – Ally visits my Facebook page and tells us about an injury she’s had:

For the scavenger hunt, a more detailed account of my Toronto Chinatown injury: I was 11 years old, and we were going to visit my great-grandmother in Toronto. The first day we were there I fell down a flight of stairs in her apartment complex and sprained my ankle. I was on crutches the rest of the trip, and somewhere my mom has a picture of me at the Chinatown arch with my crutches and Ace bandage.

9:40 p.m. – After what I perceive as a long silence, Ally begs to be let off haiku-writing.

https://twitter.com/#!/wordvagabond/status/182280397818822656

10:32 p.m. – The haiku is submitted. The other contenders are pretty much dead silent at this point.

https://twitter.com/#!/wordvagabond/status/182293696870490113

10:39 p.m.  – She tweets this for the seedy bar category, which isn’t strictly speaking, what I asked for, but which counts.

https://twitter.com/#!/wordvagabond/status/182295076775530496

Let’s take a look at The Leaderboard now.

Ally :10

Mary-Jo :4

Alena :5

E.S. : 3

Heidi: 1

Tamela : 1

Linsey : 1

Ally is the clear and undisputed winner. She wins either the tee of her choice from my store or the iPhone case.

Thank you for playing, ladies. And winners, get those snail mail addresses in to me so I can send you your prizes!

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Paperback!

This is just a quick post to say oh my god the book is out.

I realize that I said that when Beware the Hawk was released on Jan. 17 as an e-book. But I’m saying it again, because it’s out as a physical book right now. I just checked both Vagabondage Press’s site and Amazon and it’s listed as a paperback. So I guess that makes me a paperback writer.

More posts later.

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Scavenger hunt winners!

It’s here! The 20th is here! That means two things:

1) My book is available as an actual, tangible volume. Look for it here!

2) You never have to see another scavenger hunt blog post from me again. (At least not for this book.)

Yay!

It also means that we have scavenger hunt winners.

Now, I know that my original Scavenger Hunt rules said  – ahem:

The first person to complete all the missions will win a signed copy of the book and another prize: If the winner has an iPhone, he or she will get a Beware the Hawk skin for his or her phone. If not, I will offer the winner a tee shirt of his or her choice from my store.

The first five people to complete at least nine of the missions will get signed copies of the book.

Well, no one completed that many missions.But I still don’t feel like I can not reward some of the participants for joining me in 10 days of foraging ’round the Internet.

Below are all the folks who did participate, and the number of missions in which they participated.

UPDATE: E.S. Cameron submitted this photo after I updated, which puts her at 3, not 2. 

Ally :4

Mary-Jo :4

Alena :4

E.S. : 3

Heidi: 1

Tamela : 1

Linsey : 1

As you can see, Ally, Moj and Alena are my top competitors. They all completed four missions. and so they will all receive signed copies of my book. And I issue this challenge to you, ladies: If one of you pulls ahead of the pack in the next 24 hours by submitting just one more entry, you may have the tee shirt of your choice from my store. This includes the forbidden dwarf lady tee shirt which is no longer visible for copyright reasons. Send me an email at annjoconnell<at>gmail<dot>com with your street address and I will send out your swag.

Lastly, here is an impressive tattoo, submitted by New England poet Linsey Jayne. It is not her tattoo – she found it on the Internet. It is a T-Rex and Optimus Prime, battling for supremacy. Or high fiving. I’m not sure which. Thank you for participating!

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Scavenger hunt, day 10; An impressive tattoo.

We’re in the home stretch. Today is the tenth and final day of the scavenger hunt. Tomorrow, Beware the Hawk becomes available at Vagabondage Press and tomorrow I will announce the winners of the hunt!

But that is tomorrow. Today, I am looking for one more item from you scavengers – a photo of a tattoo. The protagonist in my book has a, shall we say, all-encompassing tattoo. You don’t have to take a photo of a full body tat, but take/find a photo of an impressive tattoo. You know the drill by now, folks: Tweet the photo with the hashtag #bewarethehawk or post it to my Facebook author page.

Now, let’s talk about pain. Yesterday – in honor of my protagonist’s cover-to-cover ankle injury – I asked you to tell me about a time when you had to live with an injury.

Mary-Jo Bates wrote this on my Facebook wall: “Being the fat kid, I made the best tug-of-war anchor. Unfortunately, being able to stand is a function of that post. Back in middle school, the class bully showed an odd moment of insight, whipping the giant jute rope around, catching my ankle, and twisting it something fierce. Still bitter my team lost on that field day.”

What a jerk that kid was. I hope s/he got a detention or a time-out. Or at least a dressing-down from the teacher.

Alena Dillon tweeted this: “I burned myself on the oven last weekend. That’s what I get for cooking. On the bright side, the scar is pretty badass.”

That must have been one hell of an oven burn to leave a badass scar. Hope it’s healing.

Lastly, Tamela Ritter made my day by walking by – and photographing – the Chinatown gate in D.C., which I’ve never seen before. Feast your eyes. It puts Boston’s gate to shame:

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Scavenger Hunt, Day 9: Bring the pain.

For day nine of the scavenger hunt, I’m not actually going to ask you to hunt for anything, but I am going to ask you to share a memory. Of pain.

My protagonist in Beware the Hawk has an ankle injury for pretty much the whole book. Tell me about a time you had to live with an injury. Points if you have a photo of yourself from that time.

I realize that these stories might run the gamut from slapstick hilarity to grave injury. Share as much as you are comfortable sharing. Tweet it to me (@ann_oconnell) with the hashtag #bewarethehawk. Or post it to my author page on Facebook.

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Scavenger Hunt, Day 8: Shamrocks!

Happy St. Patrick’s Day! We’ve been scavenger hunting for a week now! A few more days and the hunt will be over.

Today’s challenge is easy. Take a picture of a shamrock, but it has to be a purple shamrock. I don’t care how you get it to be purple, but it needs to be purple.

Why? Because in Beware the Hawk there’s a scene in which my protagonist meets a cute Irish guy in a bar called The Purple Shamrock. It’s too perfect. You’d think I’d planned this scavenger hunt for this week when I was writing the book a decade ago.

Tweet your shamrocks to me (@ann_oconnell) with the hashtag #bewarethehawk. Or post it to my author page on Facebook. If you have an iPhone, you may also use Instagram and post your photo with the #bewarethehawk hashtag.

Moving on, I should have known better than to send you folks to Craigslist yesterday to search for questionable ads, because the submissions I received are definitely NSFW.*

Luckily it’s Saturday, so go ahead and feast your eyes on the entry submitted by Mary-Jo Bates. The poster of this ad wants to tell you how to get to Skankville. That’s all I’ve  got right now. Alena Dillon’s submission was so spicy that it got pulled off the Internet by Craig and his Craigslist elves before I was able to post it.

Happy St. Patrick’s Day. I look forward to lots of purple shamrocks.

*That’s “Not Safe For Work,” folks.

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Scavenger Hunt, Day 7: The List of Craig

It’s day seven of the scavenger hunt and I want you to scour the Internet for today’s mission.

The protagonist in Beware the Hawk is a courier for a secret anti-government group called The Resistance. She found this job by responding to an intriguing ad on Craigslist. So today I’d like you to find an intriguing ad on Craigslist. It doesn’t have to be for a secret agency. It can be anything you find interesting or mysterious or  nefarious or just plain awesome.

Then tweet the link to me (@ann_oconnell) with the hashtag #bewarethehawk. Or post it to my author page on Facebook.

Speaking of which, let’s look at the results of yesterday’s mission, which was to write a haiku about a bird of prey. I’m excited to report that I had several submissions, and all of them are very different. Here they are, in order of receipt:

Mary-Jo Bates, who offers a different take on what a bird of prey is:

Robin feet in dirt
Worm hold lost
Flesh into flesh.

Esteemed poet Heidi St. Jean, sticking with the “hawk” theme:

Hawk stands tall on pine,
never wavering in wind –
breathes in warm mouse scent.

Alena Dillon, bemoaning the loss of her snack to a Long Island bird of prey:

It stole my pizza
and dropped it in the ocean
I so hate seagulls

Erin Skelly Cameron, with a requiem for a mouse:

Field mouse frolicking,
Beware the hawk swooping down!
Oh, no – no more mouse.

I was sort of sad that no one wrote a haiku about this kind of bird of prey, but that's just me.

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I get my first proof, and get very excited about some very local press.

,

This is the sort of thing you could see all the time if you followed my author page on Facebook.

Remember how yesterday, I posted that my proof for the physical copy of Beware the Hawk was coming very soon? Well it did – I got it yesterday, and everyone who follows my Facebook fan page was forced to look at a crazy photo of me holding it.

It was amazing. I ran around the house like a little kid. I stared at it. I read it. I stared at it some more. I waved it at my husband. It’s right next to me now.

And then I talked to my father on the phone and he told me that this week’s issue of my hometown newspaper, The Town Times, ran an announcement about my upcoming appearance at the Watertown Library. Now, I used to work at a local paper. I’ve placed people’s announcements. It was no biggie. If there was enough space for them, I put them in. Nothing to get worked up about. I could understand people getting excited if a reporter wrote about them and someone came out to take a photo, but a press release? Not exciting.

Well, I don’t know when I got un-jaded.

When my father told me that my press release was in the Town Times I flipped. I freaked out like Time Magazine had named me Person of the Year. Why? I don’t know. Probably because when I was a kid, it was my great ambition to make it into the Town Times. Whenever a photographer from the Town Times went to anything, I tried desperately to look extra involved in whatever they were photographing so that they would take my picture. And then the paper would come on Thursday and I inevitably wouldn’t be in the photo and I’d sulk.

Clearly this attention-hungry child lives on within me.

You know, if I knew I’d get this much of a rush from being in the Town Times, I would have let my mom submit my wedding announcement.

Who knows? Maybe my desire to get into journalism came from my weekly desire to see myself in the Town Times. I knew that I’d be guaranteed a byline whenever the paper came out. All in all, today was a very good day to be a writer from Oakville.

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Scavenger Hunt, Day Six: The haiku challenge.

Before I share today’s challenge, a bit of news: I heard from my editor yesterday afternoon, and she tells me that I’ll be getting the proof for the physical copy of Beware the Hawk very soon!

I’m curious to see what that will look like, since Beware the Hawk is less than 50 pages long. I’ve been reading several of literature’s greatest short books lately (The House on Mango Street, The Stranger, Heart of Darkness, Turn of the Screw) and all of them are pretty slim volumes, but Beware the Hawk is shorter than all of them. That’s going to be one narrow book spine.

Because of all that shortness, today’s challenge will celebrate brevity with the shortest form of all: the haiku.

Write me a haiku about a bird of prey.

You know what a haiku is, right? Of course you do. Three lines of poetry. Line one has five syllables, line two has seven syllables and line three has five syllables. I realize this isn’t really a hunt. In fact I was planning to have you search for a haiku about a bird of prey, but writing haiku is more fun. (Although if you’d rather search for one, be my guest, just credit the poet when you submit.)

Tweet the poem to me (@ann_oconnell) with the hashtag #bewarethehawk. Or post it to my author page on Facebook.

Speaking of which, I have some neat iPhone apps to share from yesterday’s challenge.

UPDATE: Erin Skelly Cameron submitted Instagram, which is a personal favorite of mine. It’s like Twitter, but with photos. Unfortunately, it’s only available for iPhone users now, and Erin owns a Droid.

Alena Dillon of The Time is Write submitted this neat app, Star Walk. It’s a sort of augmented stargazing app. You point your phone the sky and the constellations appear. You point it at an unidentified object and it tells you what you’re looking at. That’s right – UFOs are a thing of the past. Your iPhone will ID every object in the sky. I think I might want it.

Ally Arendt of WordVagabond submitted a link to an app for writers, FIG. FIG stands for Fiction Idea Generator, and it’s a plot generator that lives in your phone. It suggests plots, genre, period, narrative voice and appears to have several other generators included including an emotion generator. That’s pretty neat, too.

Normally I just sponge off the free iPhone apps and tolerate all the advertising that comes with them, but maybe I should shell out the five bucks for these two apps. Any other suggestions, folks?

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